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Views from the Choir Loft

Stephen Colbert: “I’m Not A Fan Of Guitar Masses”

Jeff Ostrowski · May 12, 2015

N A RECENT ARTICLE, I made the case that upbeat Church music which is “catchy” should be performed properly. Stephen Colbert seems to agree:


I’ve never been a Colbert fan—I don’t find him funny. 1 However, I agree with him on this subject. If Church music relies heavily on rhythm and syncopation, it should be performed that way. We have an obligation to perform music properly.

Years ago, Colbert performed an animated LITURGICAL DANCE to a popular hymn—sung in Catholic churches everywhere—and his video went viral. Several people used this opportunity to exclaim, “See how wrong liturgical dance is?”  But they completely missed the point. Colbert didn’t do anything wrong; he was merely responding to a highly syncopated style of music.

I find it interesting that Stephen Colbert—a comedian—realizes that not all musical styles are appropriate for Mass; yet our hierarchy (with a few notable exceptions) won’t come near this issue. Jimmy Fallon—another comedian—recently declared that Mass has become too informal, lacking solemnity:

There’s Frisbees being thrown, there’s beach balls going around, people waving lighters, and I go, “This is too much for me.” I want the old way. I want to hang out with the—you know—with the nuns, you know, that was my favorite type of Mass…and the Grotto and just like—straight up, just—“MASS-MASS.”   (source)

Now I must stop, because I don’t want to repeat myself. We’ve already discussed how most “progressive” liturgists avoid admitting their true position. Their true position is that all musical styles are acceptable for the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass.



NOTES FROM THIS ARTICLE:

1   According to reports, Mr. Colbert teaches Sunday School Catechism classes each week, which is kind of cool.

Opinions by blog authors do not necessarily represent the views of Corpus Christi Watershed.

Filed Under: Articles Tagged With: Stephen Colbert Guitar Masses Last Updated: January 1, 2020

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About Jeff Ostrowski

Jeff Ostrowski holds his B.M. in Music Theory from the University of Kansas (2004). He resides with his wife and children in Los Angeles.—(Read full biography).

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Corpus Christi Watershed

Quick Thoughts

    Hymn by Cardinal Newman
    During the season of Septuagesima, we will be using this hymn by Cardinal Newman, which employs both Latin and English. (Readers probably know that Cardinal Newman was one of the world's experts when it comes to Lingua Latina.) The final verse contains a beautiful soprano descant. Father Louis Bouyer—famous theologian, close friend of Pope Paul VI, and architect of post-conciliar reforms—wrote thus vis-à-vis the elimination of Septuagesima: “I prefer to say nothing, or very little, about the new calendar, the handiwork of a trio of maniacs who suppressed (with no good reason) Septuagesima and the Octave of Pentecost and who scattered three quarters of the Saints higgledy-piddledy, all based on notions of their own devising!”
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    Introit • Candlemas (2 February)
    “Candlemas” • Our choir sang on February 2nd, and here's a live recording of the beautiful INTROIT: Suscépimus Deus. We had very little time to rehearse, but I think it has some very nice moments. I promise that by the 8th Sunday after Pentecost it will be perfect! (That Introit is repeated on the 8th Sunday after Pentecost.) We still need to improve, but we're definitely on the right track!
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    Simplified Antiphons • “Candlemas”
    Anyone who desires simplified antiphons (“psalm tone versions”) for 2 February, the Feast of the Purification—which is also known as “Candlemas” or the Feast of the Presentation—may freely download them. The texts of the antiphons are quite beautiful. From “Lumen Ad Revelatiónem Géntium” you can hear a live excerpt (Mp3). I'm not a fan of chant in octaves, but we had such limited time to rehearse, it seemed the best choice. After all, everyone should have an opportunity to learn “Lumen Ad Revelatiónem Géntium,” which summarizes Candlemas.
    —Jeff Ostrowski

Random Quote

“The Catholic Church has a dignity far surpassing that of every merely human society, for it was founded by Christ the Lord. It is altogether fitting, therefore, that the language it uses should be noble, majestic, and non-vernacular.”

— Blessed John XXIII (22 February 1962)

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