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Views from the Choir Loft

Steering Wedding Dates away from Advent & Lent

Fr. David Friel · March 9, 2014

Y NEXT WEDDING is scheduled for May, which means that, this year, I am spared the difficult task of balancing the joy of a ritual Mass with the somber character of Holy Lent. What does the Church have to say about weddings in penitential seasons?

She says very little, actually. According to the General Instruction:

Ritual Masses are connected to the celebration of certain Sacraments or Sacramentals. They are prohibited on Sundays of Advent, Lent, and Easter, on solemnities, on the days within the Octave of Easter, on the Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed (All Souls’ Day), on Ash Wednesday, and during Holy Week, taking due account of the norms given in the ritual books or in the Masses themselves. (GIRM, 372)

It is within the purview of dioceses and parishes to add further limitations, if they so desire, but these are the only universal restrictions. You will notice that, while weddings are permitted on Lenten weekdays, they are forbidden on the Sundays of the same season. Are priests and others involved in liturgical matters supposed to see in the rule for Sundays of a particular season a model for what is desirable on the weekdays of that same season? The letter of the law is not in question; it is clear that weddings are permitted on all days except those noted above. But, would the spirit of the law dissuade us entirely from celebrating weddings in penitential seasons?

Before the Second Vatican Council, it was not allowable to celebrate a nuptial Mass or impart a nuptial blessing during Advent or Lent. Only a wedding ceremony outside of Mass was permitted. Ought this former practice to influence our current practice?

The USCCB offer this information on the marriage section of their website:

There are no legal restrictions on when the Rite of Marriage may be celebrated, with the exception of the Triduum, as long as the various guidelines specific to the particular parish are respected. When the Rite of Marriage includes a Mass there are limitations as to dates and readings. . . . When a wedding coincides with a major feast the readings for that feast must be respected. Weddings during penitential seasons must respect the church tone and décor appropriate for the season.

The strictures of the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of America, available on their website, are more narrow than the present regulations of the Roman Catholic Church. Personally, I find the Greek Orthodox policy admirable for its fidelity to a sense of sacred time. Following are their directives concerning days when marriage is not permitted:

Marriages are not performed on fast days or during fasting seasons; these include the Great Lent and Holy Week; August 1-15; August 29 (Beheading of St. John the Baptist); September 14 (Exaltation of the Holy Cross); and December 13-25. Nor are marriages celebrated on the day before and the day of a Great Feast of the Lord, including Theophany (January 5 and 6); Pascha; Pentecost; and Christmas (December 24 and 25). Marriages may be performed on these days only by permission of the diocesan Bishop.

When weddings are celebrated in Advent and Lent, many issues arise that do not surface at other times. How festive is too festive? What sort of flower arrangements are permissible? If it is a Friday night wedding, what food will be served at the reception? Perhaps the better, larger question is whether a nuptial Mass is really in keeping with the spirit of a Friday in Lent.

Musically, there are other dualities that yearn for reconciliation. The Gloria, for instance, is omitted on the Sundays of Lent and Advent; according to the third edition of the Roman Missal, however, the Gloria is prescribed for all weddings, even in the seasons of Lent and Advent. In another place, the Missal states that, “during Lent . . . the use of musical instruments is allowed only so as to support the singing.” Does this rule out instrumental music during weddings within Lent? When celebrating a wedding in Lent, which takes precedence: the ritual or the season? It would seem that the ritual takes precedence, but its celebration ought to be mitigated by its seasonal context.

Not many of the couples we deal with as priests and sacred musicians use the Liturgical Desk Calendar as their personal planner. For most, the cycle of the liturgical year probably registers as hardly a “blip” on their wedding preparation radar. It is therefore all the more incumbent upon us to be that “blip.” We could try not only to steer couples away from selecting a date in Advent or Lent, but perhaps even encourage them to choose a date during the Christmas or Easter seasons.

If we prepare ourselves well, the routine meetings we regularly schedule with couples can grow to be something more than occasions to arrange mundane details. They can become moments for formative catechesis, given in charity.

Opinions by blog authors do not necessarily represent the views of Corpus Christi Watershed.

Filed Under: Articles Tagged With: Nuptial Mass, Roman Missal Third Edition Last Updated: January 1, 2020

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About Fr. David Friel

Ordained in 2011, Father Friel is a priest of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia and serves as Director of Liturgy at Saint Charles Borromeo Seminary. —(Read full biography).

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Corpus Christi Watershed

President’s Corner

    PDF Download • “Polyphonic Extension” (Kevin Allen) for Gloria III
    EVIN ALLEN was commissioned by Sacred Music Symposium 2025 to compose a polyphonic ‘middle section’ for the GLORIA from Mass III, often denoted by its trope name: Missa Kyrie Deus sempiterne. This year, I’m traveling from Singapore to serve on the symposium faculty. I will be conducting Palestrina’s ‘Ave Maria’ as well as teaching plainsong to the men. A few days ago, I was asked to record rehearsal videos for this beautiful polyphonic extension. (See below.) This polyphonic composition fits ‘inside’ GLORIA III. That is, the congregation sings for the beginning and end, but the choir alone adds polyphony to the middle. The easiest way to understand how everything fits together is by examining this congregational insert. You may download the score, generously made available to the whole world—free of charge—by CORPUS CHRISTI WATERSHED:
    *  PDF Download • Gloria III ‘Middle Section’ (Kevin Allen)
    Free rehearsal videos for each individual voice await you at #24366. Related News • My colleague, Jeff Ostrowski, composed an organ accompaniment for this same GLORIA a few months ago. Obviously, the organist should drop out when the polyphony is being sung.
    —Corrinne May
    “Booklet of Eucharistic Hymns” (16 pages)
    I was asked to create a booklet for my parish to use during our CORPUS CHRISTI PROCESSION on 22 June 2025. Would you be willing to look over the DRAFT BOOKLET (16 pages) I came up with? I tried to include a variety of hymns: some have a refrain; some are in major, others in minor; some are metered, others are plainsong; some are in Spanish, some are in Latin, but most are in English. Normally, we’d use the Brébeuf Hymnal—but we can’t risk having our congregation carry those heavy books all over the city to various churches.
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    “Yahweh” in church songs?
    My pastor asked me to write a weekly column for our parish bulletin. The one scheduled to run on 22 June 2025 is called “Three Words in a Psalm” and speaks of translating the TETRAGRAMMATON. You can read the article at this column repository. All of them are quite brief because I was asked to keep within a certain word limit.
    —Jeff Ostrowski

Quick Thoughts

    Antiphons Don’t Match?
    A reader wants to know why the Entrance and Communion antiphons in certain publications deviate from what’s prescribed by the GRADUALE ROMANUM published after Vatican II. Click here to read our answer. The short answer is: the Adalbert Propers were never intended to be sung. They were intended for private Masses only (or Masses without music). The “Graduale Parvum,” published by the John Henry Newman Institute of Liturgical Music in 2023, mostly uses the Adalbert Propers—but sometimes uses the GRADUALE text: e.g. Solemnity of Saints Peter and Paul (29 June).
    —Corpus Christi Watershed
    When to Sit, Stand and Kneel like it’s 1962
    There are lots of different guides to postures for Mass, but I couldn’t find one which matched our local Latin Mass, so I made this one: sit-stand-kneel-crop
    —Veronica Brandt
    The Funeral Rites of the Graduale Romanum
    Lately I have been paging through the 1974 Graduale Romanum (see p. 678 ff.) and have been fascinated by the funeral rites found therein, especially the simply-beautiful Psalmody that is appointed for all the different occasions before and after the funeral Mass: at the vigil/wake, at the house of the deceased, processing to the church, at the church, processing to the cemetery, and at the cemetery. Would that this “stational Psalmody” of the Novus Ordo funeral rites saw wider usage! If you or anyone you know have ever used it, please do let me know.
    —Daniel Tucker

Random Quote

“Before any seminarian is accepted for ordination, he must not only strive for chastity but actually achieve it. He must already be living chaste celibacy peacefully and for a prolonged period of time—for if this be lacking, the seminarian and his formators cannot have the requisite confidence that he is called to the celibate life.”

— Archbishop Viganò (16 February 2019)

Recent Posts

  • PDF Download • “Polyphonic Extension” (Kevin Allen) for Gloria III
  • “Booklet of Eucharistic Hymns” (16 pages)
  • PDF Download • “Text by Saint Francis of Assisi” (choral setting w/ organ: Soprano & Alto)
  • “Yahweh” in church songs?
  • “Music List” • Pentecost Sunday

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