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Views from the Choir Loft

Worst Song Ever?

Jeff Ostrowski · October 3, 2015

241 Rebecca Y ARTICLE TODAY won’t make sense unless you google “Rebecca Black Friday.” This music video was viewed by 200 million people in 2011, and most said it was the worst song ever produced. Contemplating this, I noticed parallels to contemporary liturgical music:

HORRIBLE RHYMES : The singer rhymes “bowl” with “cereal.” Later, she rhymes “kicking” with “sitting.” On this blog, we’ve often decried similar rhyming in hymnals with USCCB approval…

OBSCENELY OBVIOUS : The song is painfully repetitious and “obvious.” It doesn’t help that Rebecca spells out everything she’s talking about, even providing visual aids for the days of the week. The content describes self-evident realities: “Tomorrow is Saturday; And Sunday comes afterwards.” This resembles certain liturgical songs which basically say, “Here we are, gathered in our church; this is where we come each Sunday…” Msgr. Andrew Wadsworth calls them “we songs,” wherein the congregation is encouraged to celebrate itself.

CATCHY : The song is rather catchy, and I suspect many people who claim to “hate” it secretly enjoy it. Sadly, this is the case with much contemporary church music. I have no problem with liturgical music being simple & catchy—like the Gregorian antiphons for the Holy Thursday foot washing—as long as it’s elegant.

MIXTURE OF STYLES : The song mixes dialects:

“Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday. TO-day i-is Friday, Friday.
We-we-we so excited. We so excited. We gonna have a ball today.”

The result is contrived and incongruous, and this is often the case with contemporary liturgical music, which cannot seem to “find its voice.”

PRODUCED WITH SKILL : Whoever shot & mastered this music video did an amazing job. I talk about this below.

WE ARE TOLD that hymnals have improved immensely since the 1970s, but I’m not so sure. I was recently given a 2013 Spanish hymnal by GIA and couldn’t wait to peruse the contents. It was a huge disappointment, and here’s an example (translated into Spanish by GIA):

Over my head, I hear music in the air;
Over my head, I hear music in the air;
Over my head, I hear music in the air;
There must be a God somewhere.

And when I’m feeling lonely, I hear music in the air;
And when I’m feeling lonely, I hear music in the air;
And when I’m feeling lonely, I hear music in the air;
There must be a God somewhere.

GIA should have searched for lyrics written by Catholics comfortable with the Spanish language; instead, they did the unthinkable. They asked someone for whom Spanish is a second language to force tons and tons of English songs into Spanish. 1 (I deleted his name, because he’s not the one at fault.) The production of this hymnal, however—like Rebecca Black’s song—was extremely professional. It’s the content which is troubling.

I HAVE COME TO BELIEVE there’s a cultural element at work here, too. We’ve lost the ability to appreciate genuine music. Have you noticed that movies these days contain lackluster songs? For example, the old Disney movies—such as Beauty and the Beast, Robin Hood, Little Mermaid, Sword in the Stone, Peter Pan, etc.—had great music. These days, it seems the music is all “beat music.” Have you seen the new version of The Lorax? Have you seen the new version of Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory? The music cannot hold a candle to the classics.

We need to get our culture to a point where they can appreciate pure music, but it won’t be easy. What is pure music? Here’s an example: 2



That’s what I call pure music—so different from uninspired beat music! (Although beat music does have its place.)




NOTES FROM THIS ARTICLE:

1   I showed the Spanish versions by GIA to friends of mine who grew up in Mexico. They were confused by many verses, which didn’t make sense to them.

2   The Gradual assigned to Easter Sunday in both the Ordinary and Extraordinary Forms.

Opinions by blog authors do not necessarily represent the views of Corpus Christi Watershed.

Filed Under: Articles Tagged With: Oramus Cantando Hymnal GIA Last Updated: January 1, 2020

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About Jeff Ostrowski

Jeff Ostrowski holds his B.M. in Music Theory from the University of Kansas (2004). He resides with his wife and children in Michigan. —(Read full biography).

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Corpus Christi Watershed

President’s Corner

    Bugnini’s Statement (6 November 1966)
    With each passing day, more is revealed about how the enemies of the liturgy accomplished their goals. For instance, Hannibal Bugnini deeply resented the way Vatican II said Gregorian Chant “must be given first place in liturgical services.” On 6 November 1966, his cadre wrote a letter attempting to justify the elimination of Gregorian Chant with this brazen statement: “What really gives a Mass its tone is not so much the songs as it is the prayers and readings.” Bugnini’s cadre then attacked the very heart of Gregorian Chant (viz. the Proprium Missae), bemoaning how the Proprium Missae “is completely new each Sunday and feast day.” There is much more to be said about this topic. Stay tuned.
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    Luis Martínez Must Go!
    Sevilla Cathedral (entry dated 13 December 1564): The chapter orders Luis Martínez, a cathedral chaplain, to stay away from the choirbook-stand when the rest of the singers gather around it to sing polyphony—the reason being that “he throws the others out of tune.” [Excerpt from “The Life of Father Francisco Guerrero.”]
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    Urgent! • We Desperately Need Funds!
    A few days ago, the president of Corpus Christi Watershed posted this urgent appeal for funds. Please help us make sure we’re never forced to place our content behind a paywall. We feel it’s crucial that 100% of our content remains free to everyone. We’re a tiny 501(c)3 public charity, entirely dependent upon the generosity of small donors. We have no endowment and no major donors. We run no advertisements and have no savings. We beg you to consider donating $4.00 per month. Thank you!
    —Jeff Ostrowski

Quick Thoughts

    Pope Pius XII Hymnal?
    Have you ever heard of the Pope Pius XII Hymnal? It’s a real book, published in the United States in 1959. Here’s a sample page so you can verify with your own eyes it existed.
    —Corpus Christi Watershed
    “Hybrid” Chant Notation?
    Over the years, many have tried to ‘simplify’ plainsong notation. The O’Fallon Propers attempted to simplify the notation—but ended up making matters worse. Dr. Karl Weinmann tried to do the same in the time of Pope Saint Pius X by replacing each porrectus. You can examine a specimen from his edition and see whether you agree he complicated matters. In particular, look at what he did with éxsules fílii Hévae.
    —Corpus Christi Watershed
    Antiphons Don’t Match?
    A reader wants to know why the Entrance and Communion antiphons in certain publications deviate from what’s prescribed by the GRADUALE ROMANUM published after Vatican II. Click here to read our answer. The short answer is: the Adalbert Propers were never intended to be sung. They were intended for private Masses only (or Masses without music). The “Graduale Parvum,” published by the John Henry Newman Institute of Liturgical Music in 2023, mostly uses the Adalbert Propers—but sometimes uses the GRADUALE text: e.g. Solemnity of Saints Peter and Paul (29 June).
    —Corpus Christi Watershed

Random Quote

“The chapter orders that any cathedral singer or instrumentalist who uses a paid leave of absence to try out for a post elsewhere shall automatically forfeit his post at Seville Cathedral.” [From “The Life of Father Francisco Guerrero.”]

— Sevilla Cathedral: Chapter Resolution (7 September 1565)

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