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Views from the Choir Loft

Only the Lover Sings

Fr. David Friel · October 26, 2014

AST WEEKEND, I had the honor of witnessing the marriage of two dear friends from South Philadelphia. It was a wonderful occasion, refreshing for the nobility of the celebration and the faith of the bride & groom.

South Philadelphia is a special place. Originally settled by Italian immigrants, the influence of that heritage still dominates the area. South Philly is home to super-authentic Italian restaurants, America’s oldest outdoor market, and the infamous Mummers Parade. It is the sacred soil upon which the Eagles, Phillies, and Flyers all play. Its many parishes are named after such beloved Italians saints as Monica, Nicholas of Tolentine, and Rita of Cascia.

South Philadelphians love traditions almost as much as they love cannoli. Many of their greatest traditions surround weddings, and one of them is particularly beautiful: the serenade.

N A DISPLAY that has remained a unique feature of South Philly culture, the groom is expected to “surprise” his bride at some point before the wedding (often the day before) by singing to her from the street. Originally, this was a simple affair, perhaps accompanied by a lone accordionist. Serenades have grown in modern times, however, to be a sometimes major (and costly) affair. Nowadays, they often feature Mummer string bands or DJ’s, and they are usually accompanied by food and dancing. Lights are strung up, the street is closed down, and all the neighbors join in the festivities.

Regardless of the ways in which the tradition has morphed and developed, the central feature of the serenade remains the same. Above all else, it is a time for the groom to sing to his bride, literally to “serenade” her. There is something remarkably beautiful about this. As Saint Augustine observes:

“Only the lover sings.” (Sermon 336)

It would be one thing for a groom to do this privately; that would be a good and worthy thing to do. But there is something different and equally good about this public serenade. True love, after all, is not governed by what others may think. Love “is not pompous, it is not inflated, it does not seek its own interests” (1 Corinthians 13:4-5). In much the same way, we express our love for God not only privately, but also corporately, through public worship.

One who has experienced true love knows that there is a natural impulse that impels the lover to sing. We see it throughout the Song of Songs and in the prophet Isaiah: “Now let me sing of my friend, my beloved’s song about his vineyard” (Isaiah 5:1). This impulse translates also into the sacred liturgy. If we believe that the liturgy is fundamentally a movement of love and an expression of our love for God, Who, Himself, is Love, then our liturgy should be sung!

The union of husband & wife is meant to be a sign of the manner in which God loves the world. The tradition of the South Philly serenade is much the same.

Opinions by blog authors do not necessarily represent the views of Corpus Christi Watershed.

Filed Under: Articles Tagged With: Catholic Wedding Nuptial Mass Music, Nuptial Mass Last Updated: January 1, 2020

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About Fr. David Friel

Ordained in 2011, Father Friel is a priest of the Archdiocese of Philadelphia and serves as Director of Liturgy at Saint Charles Borromeo Seminary. —(Read full biography).

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President’s Corner

    Urgent! • We Desperately Need Funds!
    A few days ago, the president of Corpus Christi Watershed posted this urgent appeal for funds. Please help us make sure we’re never forced to place our content behind a paywall. We feel it’s crucial that 100% of our content remains free to everyone. We’re a tiny 501(c)3 public charity, entirely dependent upon the generosity of small donors. We have no endowment and no major donors. We run no advertisements and have no savings. We beg you to consider donating $4.00 per month. Thank you!
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    “Booklet of Eucharistic Hymns” (16 pages)
    I was asked to create a booklet for my parish to use during our CORPUS CHRISTI PROCESSION on 22 June 2025. Would you be willing to look over the DRAFT BOOKLET (16 pages) I came up with? I tried to include a variety of hymns: some have a refrain; some are in major, others in minor; some are metered, others are plainsong; some are in Spanish, some are in Latin, but most are in English. Normally, we’d use the Brébeuf Hymnal—but we can’t risk having our congregation carry those heavy books all over the city to various churches.
    —Jeff Ostrowski
    “Yahweh” in church songs?
    My pastor asked me to write a weekly column for our parish bulletin. The one scheduled to run on 22 June 2025 is called “Three Words in a Psalm” and speaks of translating the TETRAGRAMMATON. You can read the article at this column repository. All of them are quite brief because I was asked to keep within a certain word limit.
    —Jeff Ostrowski

Quick Thoughts

    Antiphons Don’t Match?
    A reader wants to know why the Entrance and Communion antiphons in certain publications deviate from what’s prescribed by the GRADUALE ROMANUM published after Vatican II. Click here to read our answer. The short answer is: the Adalbert Propers were never intended to be sung. They were intended for private Masses only (or Masses without music). The “Graduale Parvum,” published by the John Henry Newman Institute of Liturgical Music in 2023, mostly uses the Adalbert Propers—but sometimes uses the GRADUALE text: e.g. Solemnity of Saints Peter and Paul (29 June).
    —Corpus Christi Watershed
    When to Sit, Stand and Kneel like it’s 1962
    There are lots of different guides to postures for Mass, but I couldn’t find one which matched our local Latin Mass, so I made this one: sit-stand-kneel-crop
    —Veronica Brandt
    The Funeral Rites of the Graduale Romanum
    Lately I have been paging through the 1974 Graduale Romanum (see p. 678 ff.) and have been fascinated by the funeral rites found therein, especially the simply-beautiful Psalmody that is appointed for all the different occasions before and after the funeral Mass: at the vigil/wake, at the house of the deceased, processing to the church, at the church, processing to the cemetery, and at the cemetery. Would that this “stational Psalmody” of the Novus Ordo funeral rites saw wider usage! If you or anyone you know have ever used it, please do let me know.
    —Daniel Tucker

Random Quote

“I am of the opinion, to be sure, that the old rite should be granted much more generously to all those who desire it. It’s impossible to see what could be dangerous or unacceptable about that. A community is calling its very being into question when it suddenly declares that what until now was its holiest and highest possession is strictly forbidden and when it makes the longing for it seem downright indecent.”

— Cardinal Ratzinger, 1997

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  • “Booklet of Eucharistic Hymns” (16 pages)
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  • “Yahweh” in church songs?

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