About this blogger:
Ronda Chervin received a Ph.D. in Philosophy from Fordham University and an MA in Religious Studies from Notre Dame Apostolic Institute. A widow, mother, and grandmother, she currently teaches philosophy at Holy Apostles College and Seminary in Cromwell, Connecticut. Write to her at chervinronda@gmail.com.
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“I vividly remember going to church with him in Bournemouth. He was a devout Roman Catholic and it was soon after the Church had changed the liturgy (from Latin to English). My grandfather obviously didn't agree with this and made all the responses very loudly in Latin while the rest of the congregation answered in English. I found the whole experience quite excruciating, but my grandfather was oblivious. He simply had to do what he believed to be right.”
— Simon Tolkien (2003)

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Questionable Motives for Breaking Up Relationships or Work Situations
published 26 October 2011 by Dr. Ronda Chervin

As I mentioned a few times I have been going to Al-Anon. I was reading this 12 Step literature and came upon a witness story of a young woman who said that because she always thought she could change the nearly perfect men she dated but couldn’t change them she would run from one to another. Now that she realizes she can only change herself she is more stable.

The Holy Spirit nudged me to consider whether that could be why I have tried 17 different groups in the 18 years since my husband died! The typical pattern would be that I hear of some wonderful existing place or plan for a group. For a little while I think it is perfect. Then I see flaws. Then I try to convince everyone to change so that the group could be in my own “image and likeness.” Then they resist. Then…I leave!!!!!

Oy veh! I have gradually extended the time frame from every 2 months to every 2 years, but still it’s pretty upsetting. Of course the only way I can do this is by living simply so that moving is relatively easy – everything I own fits into one truck load.

Now the next step would be that in the next living situation I am in I will not try to change anyone but myself.

Wanna pray for me?

Read more blog entries by Dr. Ronda by visiting RONDAVIEW. Dr. Ronda Chervin has many free e-books and audios on her website rondachervin.com. If you go to her website and read or listen and then want to correspond with her she will be available. Her schedule does not permit, however, responding to comments on the Blog, though she enjoys reading them. Dr. Ronda’s newest project is spiritualityrunningtogod.com.